til the end
by RinYamanari
Summary: Living a miserable life, a young girl would give everything to be with Orochimaru. The problem? Right, he doesn't even know she exists. This One-shot describes her thoughts and feelings for him and questions she would ask him if she had the chance to.
1. Chapter 1

Orochimaru. The name that drives me crazy. More than crazy to be honest. Whenever I coincidentally hear someone talk about you, I get red as a tomato. Why you ask? Because I'm in love with you or so I think. Can you even call it love or is it even an obsession?

People call me crazy and in fact I am. I'm obsessed with a criminal, I, a kunoichi from Konohagakure, am in love with Orochimaru, can you believe that? I'm waiting for him, every f*cking day I expect him to come into my house and take me with him.

You know, my life isn't what you call beautiful or however you would call a life that's nice and awesome and exciting. It never was, because every single person in my environment made sure to make it hell. Bullying, fighting parents, abuse, violence etc. I've seen all of that and one day it was kinda normal to me, at least more or less.

Whenever I've got a problem, I lock myself up in my room and put on the sound-village headband I stole from a dead shinobi. Why, you ask? Because I want to. I'm sure I'd feel better if I could be with him. No matter how much I try to deny it, I just can't.

I saw him just once, two years ago when he attacked the village during the chu-nin-exams. We were told to run into the ho-kage monument, but I refused to. I wanted to fight, so I killed one or two sound-ninjas and when went to the arena, that's where I saw him fighting against the third. I'll never forget that, it seemed so easy to him plus he looked handsome while fighting. Unfortunately a leaf shinobi saw me and brought me to the monument.

You didn't notice me back then, did you? Of course not, how could you? You were absorbed in the fight against the man you once called sensei and you did it. You managed to kill him. Were you happy when he finally died? Someone told me that you've also met your old student, Anko Mitarashi. Did it hurt to see her all grown up, but hating you, now, even though she admired you all those years ago?

These are only a few out of the questions I'd ask you if I got the chance to meet you somehow. I need you, I really do, because my life is miserable and I'm sure you would give it a meaning. You know, today I had trouble with my family, again. Their expectations are too high for me. I can't live up to them. I need you to get me out of here, save me from this loneliness, this emptiness I feel inside. I need you to be the first one to compliment me, even if you wouldn't mean it, it would feel nice.

I'm at a point now there I don't care what you would do to me if I'd be with you. I'd do everything you want me to, no matter how I'd feel about it. Even if you would use me as an experiment or vessel, I wouldn't care as long as I could be of any use to me. It could be so easy. You just had to promise me a better life and I'd be your slave 'til I die. Not everyone would be that easy to get, huh? I know your childhood wasn't easy, too, so maybe you can understand me. Maybe there was also a time there you would have done everything for just one compliment, one sign of love, but one day you had your team and your sensei. You never really wanted to show emotions, always keep that cold facade, just like me, because you thought that would make you look strong. Compared to me, you've warmed up one day, not much, but at least a bit. You had your friends and people admired you. One day you became a teacher yourself. You could have everything. Why couldn't you stay? Because if you did, I'm sure we would have ran across each other at least once. In that case, I would've talked to you and everything could have been perfect,but you left the village and now you're hated by most of the people.

I don't hate you. I love you, I admire you, I adore you, I idolize you. You're like a god to me. If someone would find out that I'm obsessed, I'm sure they'd imprison me just to make sure I don't run over to you. That's pathetic, don't you agree? I don't even know where you are and you don't even know I exist. Even if you did and you would want me to come to you, a simple prison wouldn't get in your way to get me, right?

I hate my family. They made me who I am and I hate myself. Yes, I've been the best in the academy, a model student, but only because my parents forced me to study every free minute I had. That's also the reason why I don't have any friends. Had no time for them and even as a Ge-nin, whenever I brought someone home, my parents threw them out immediately. I've got the feeling that they didn't want me to be happy and they still don't do. They just want me to become the best Kunoichi of the village, because they never managed stuff like that. They are just average Jo-Nin, nothing special.

You're listed as an S-rank criminal. _Note: Extremely dangerous! Don't risk a fight 1 vs 1! Run away and look for a team to help you out! _I guess that means they're afraid of you, but I am not. I would instantly go down on my knees out of respect if I ever crossed paths with you. Who knows, maybe I would be too excited to get out a single word and just stutter and totally embarrass myself. I wouldn't care as long as you would acknowledge me and take me with you. That's my biggest dream.

Can't you see how much I need you? Could I not convince you? Why aren't you already here to get me? Oh right, because you don't know I exist...

But I do!

And somehow, I don't know how, I'll make you notice me.

Then I'll work for you and be your slave.

'til the end.

If you want to even for eternity.

**Finally a new story from me :D I hope you liked it. At the moment, I'm working on another new fanfiction, this time it's a longer story again and not only a one-shot. I think you can look forward to that :) While writing this one-shot, I've been thinking about a sequel, the idea just hit me. In that sequel I would describe the feelings of Orochimaru towards the girl, if he had noticed her while he fought the ho-kage. Would you like to read that? Then leave a simple comment and as soon as I've got 5 comments, I'll right it. **

**See ya!**


	2. Sequel info

I've posted the first chapter of the sequel "letters to Orochimaru"! Before I'll write from Orochimaru's POV, I decided to give the narrator more time to express her feelings. Read, if you want to know where this all will get!


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